Hi Sahara,
Thank you for your lovely stories. The one about the mother who reminded us to secure your own mask first struck a cord. I have a teenage son with High Functioning Aspergers. Most of the time he is great; although, when he has an upset things are very challenging. I went through pretty much the same thing most parents experience with special needs children. You feel guilty and desperately try everything possible to fix them. I tried therapy, medications (doctors call it finding the right cocktail), diets, books, support groups, you name it. I was frustrated, depressed and felt like a failure when nothing was working. Finally, when I stopped trying to “fix” him and began to “understand” him things changed. I understood that he lacked social skills and felt alienated by his peers and others. I understood that he needed structure and support, instead of rules, that he didn’t fully understand the importance of following. Why? What does it mean to me if I do or don’t (turn in homework, make bed, pick up after myself)?
Today, I know when he has an upset that he will apologize for his rude behavior like he always does once he cools off and thinks about his actions. Last year when he was 15 his dear Grandfather passed away. My son Ramon (now 16yrs), loves poetry and he wrote a poem that he read at his funeral.
He ended it with:
I share this my favorite quote for you Grandpa:
Yesterday is history
Tomorrow is a mystery
Today is a gift

Today, I understand how to better support him by taking better care of myself.
Much Aloha,
Gail